So I'm Not Perfect

Try as I might I just cannot seem to always do the right thing in the right way at the right time. Over the years one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn is to humble myself enough to admit when I make mistakes. Recently I started thinking about how I really don't need to be perfect, rather I need to remember that my focus should be on God's perfect will. So that's where I am trying to live. One would think the more often you get the opportunity to say I'm sorry, I really blew it, you would get used to it. Not me. I'm a perfectionist at heart but I'm willing to learn how to admit my mistakes. At least now I can spit the words out, please forgive me I was wrong without feeling the need to justify my actions. After all, excuses are just a way to pass the blame to something else. Believe me, I have used my share of excuses in the past too. I have found that I grow the most when I just accept the blame and work to improve. I also find others more willing to forgive whenever I take full responsibility for my actions. Still, I love the sound of the word's, God's Perfect Will. There just seems to be an abundance of comfort in the thought.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Final payment

I'm one payment away from paying off my 2003 van. I was 18 the last time I wasn't making payments on a vehicle and I have never actually paid one off. My first car I purchased for $175 dollars and it was barely worth it. I don't even remember the make or model but I do know it was a light blue color, had four doors, needed a screwdriver in order to open the trunk and sucked oil as if it was free. Still, I loved that car because it birthed my first sense of freedom. No longer did I need mom's permission to take the car somewhere. I had wheels and I was mobile! I loved my life then even though I was dead broke, had no idea what I was going to do with the rest of my life and honestly could only see to the next date with my then steady boyfriend, Michael (now my husband of 20 years). Little did I know that 22 years later I would be looking at freedom in a whole new light. My final payment reminds me so much of the lasting payment Christ made for me and the true freedom I ha...
Read more

Longing For Success

Image
Ever caught yourself wishing you were someone else?   Though I hate to admit it, I have. I didn’t really want to be the other person; instead, I longed to have my own sense of accomplishment. I looked at their life and wished I was as successful in school, in my career, with my health, in my marriage, or as a parent.   Reality check! It took me a while to realize a longing to have what someone else has would never bring to fruition those things I most desired. It may however, bring about bitterness, envy and strife. Yikes! The truth is, there is not another me. I have been formed, skilled, matured, mentored, given specific responsibilities and placed right where I am for a very specific purpose.   So have you. So have they. When I longed to have what someone else had I was usually looking for a shortcut to get me to where I wanted to be. Or l was looking for an excuse on which to hang my own feelings of inadequacy. Or maybe I was focused on selfish ambitions rather than k...
Read more

A Thin Place For Me - Now I See

I never knew I was blind considering I could see. Guilt, stolen innocence, and abandonment defined me. No one knew I held secrets. Very few saw what I did and no one, not even my husband, knew the real me. “We’re starting a bible study if you’re interested.” Interested? Me? Not in the least. I was raised in the church. Raised and rejected. I was done with God! I feared He knew my secrets. I believed He was watching and waiting to get me. Clearly this was not for me. I still don’t know why I went. I’m sure it was to stay in the inviter’s good graces. The grace, however, was for me. Love, they exuded it, I wanted it! Never had I desired something more. How could I get it? I wasn’t worth it. And yet I was. One simple prayer of repentance and acceptance of Christ transformed my life. The prayer seeped from my heart and out my lips; the weight of my past fell away. I was transformed but I held one old friend, bitterness . I learned the only way to get rid of it is to give it to ...
Read more